I spend a lot of time thinking about…

The uselessness of car headlight wipers where it doesn’t snow; whether Jared gets laid for making all of those Subway commercials; why people didn’t realize that a volcano called “Eyjafjallajökull” was predestined to create a shit storm; the mysterious rise of bands like the Jonas Brothers; how Q-tips are the jewel in the crown of human achievement; and that Greek dude Clitoris that all of the ladies keep talking about.

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