If somebody writes a touching memoir about being marooned on the broken-down Carnival cruise ship, we’ve reached an impressive new low in humanity.
50
Voters in Sao Paulo, Brazil’s largest state, just elected an illiterate clown to Congress. He ran on the platform, “It can’t get any worse.” With gems like these, who needs fiction for entertainment anymore?
49
Is MSG really bad for you, or are we all sad victims of the fallout from the salt/sugar industries political smear campaign against deliciousness?
48
Not to sound like a Twat, but the punctuation of Twinglish is appalling. #Twitter
47
Let’s have a moment of silence for the political career of Rich Whitney, the Green Party gubernatorial candidate in Illinois whose name was misspelled “Rich Whitey” in 23 wards on the voting machines.
46
Sh*t My Granny Says: “It is good to know that the [film] industry is still capable of making a movie that doesn’t have a bunch of car crashes, robots or animated whatsits in it.”
45
An acquaintance with poor taste just berated my writing and my hair turned quite gold from grief.
44
My advice to you Broadway Spiderman producers: suck with ALL your heart. Hire some drunken improv actors and spin a cult classic.
43
Heartrending tale of abject poverty: a measly $1.05 billion in profit, only double what they made last year. How will Goldman Sachs employees feed their families? I’d like to announce my new non-profit, the Banking Assistance and Relief Fund (BARF). Your contribution will help us combat destitution on Wall Street and banish impunity wherever these violations occur. Thank you.
42
U.S. Department of Treasury has announced that if James Franco scribbles on a cocktail napkin, it passes as legal tender.