A proposed alternative to cheesing: shake up and huff a can of sugar-free Red Bull.
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What is the meaning of life? It’s “a state characterized by a capacity for metabolism, growth, reaction to stimuli, and reproduction”. I think my work is done for the day.
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Things that delight me: 1) The “Most Interesting Man in the World” is named Jonathan Goldsmith and lives in Vermont. 2) Vladmir Putin, whose most recent attention-grabbing stunt involved leading a migration of endangered Siberian cranes via hang glider, asks Goldsmith for tips on enhancing his public allure.
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I too jump for joy and click my heels when standing on a giant slice of bacon.
Winning.
In the game of life, integrity is a weak opponent against the importance of WINNING. Athletes doping (Lance Armstrong and Melky Cabrera), university cheating (Harvard), plagiarism (Jonah Lehrer), political conventions (see extensive archives on Paul Ryan at Factcheck.org)… and all of this has been covered in the news only recently. Just imagine how many “glittering successes” among us won’t ever be exposed.
Blore’s Razor Primer for the 2012 Presidential Smackdown
* On Community Organizer, Constitutional Law Professor and Author, President Barack Obama: “There’s always something suspect about an intellectual on the winning side.” (Vaclav Havel)
* On Bu$ine$$ $uper$tar, Mitt Romney: “How can wealth persuade poverty to use its political freedom to keep wealth in power?” (Aneurin Bevan)
* On Legendary Gaffe Artist, Joe Biden: “Human speech is like a cracked kettle on which we tap crude rhythms for bears to dance to, while we long to make music that will melt the stars.” (Gustave Flaubert)
* On Personal Responsibility Enthusiast, Paul Ryan: “A maximum of comfort is necessary for the practice of virtue. Poverty is earned and deserved.” (Adaptation of Patrice Lumumba)
* On Political Promises: “Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second best policy.” (George Carlin)
* On Political Scandals: “To knock a thing down, especially if it is cocked at an arrogant angle, is a deep delight in the blood.” (George Santayana)
* On Political Outcomes: “Before enlightenment—chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment—chop wood, carry water.” (Zen proverb)
* On Bill Murray: “You may never get to touch the Master, but you can tickle his creatures.” (Thomas Pynchon)